A Happy Ending to The Zahir

The writer spent nights without sleep and days delving into the depth his mysterious thoughts about his wife (or ex-wife because he can’t decide what status she has after she has left without leaving any message explaining to him that weird decision). In his mind, he could build worlds and destroy others. He was haunted by the Zahir. He refrained from eating and drinking. He was fed by the good memories he had with Esther. Good memories that have torn him apart and simultaneously bewildered his mind because he could not fathom out the reason why she has left him without any alert.

“Does she really love me,” the writer wonders“ 

"If she does, she would not leave me. She would stay and console me for I’m undergoing dreadful experiences these days. She would stay because we have spent beautiful and cheerful dozen of years together,” he was trying to convince himself.

Day in day out, the writer started to feel that his days are reiterated. He had the feeling that he was doing the same activities. At night thinking endlessly and constantly about Esther until the first light of dawn breaks into his room and which sheds a straight light on the wall leaving him to wonder about whether he has chances to meet her again or not. At day light he tries to find an answer to why she has left him. As a way to change the routine, the writer began to go to a restaurant nearby his house. There, he knew about a famous therapy group in the city. It was run by Mikhail, a Kazakh who was helped by the writer’s wife after he felt hopeless and lost.

In the evening, the writer unexpectedly got up from his bed and put on his clothes then headed to the restaurant. On a secluded table, he was watching the show that Mikhail was exhibiting with a group of people who used to regularly attend it. Each of them had many family and social problems that were stuck in their minds and they wanted to free themselves from the burden they carried each day. Voicing one’s thought makes a person feel secured and helps in alleviating the burden.

The writer hesitated many times to get on that stage and unravel the worlds the mystery that causes him insomnia. Yet, one day he managed to talk to Mikhail at the end of the regular sessions. To his surprise, he found out that Esther, who is much older than him, was in love with Mikhail.

unexpectedly, the writer showed no emotions about that. His main concern was to know about her (ex-)wife's new residence. He knew that she used to hang out with Mikhail and thought having a conversation with him might give him a clue. After a series of meetings and conversations, Mikhail told the writer about the location of Esther written on a paper and inserted in an envelope. 
  

The next day, the writer packed his luggage and set off his way to Kazakhstan where Esther lives. Once the writer reached the place by the help of Mikhail and Dos, Mikhail’s friend, he took off his jacket and lit a cigarette then sat on the footstep of Esther’s house. Because he felt that he fulfilled his purpose, he thought of getting back and forgetting about the whole issue. Then he made up his mind and opened the door of the house to find out that she was reading an article, which he wrote years ago and which he dedicated to her, to a couple of children.

“Class is dismissed now. I have to have a word with an old friend,” Esther said to the children 

“Okay, Madam. Have a nice day” the children politely replied

The writer’s eyes burst into tears and started weeping like a young child. Esther was coming along to him and her eyes were full of tears. They did not say a word. She hugged him and whispered in his ears

“I miss you so much. I’ve committed a big mistake for leaving you. Your absence made me rethink so many things I was wrong at. I came to the conclusion that you are the perfect person to me and no one will take your place.” She affectionately whispered in his ears.

The writer was stuttering over words because he was weeping. She could barely hear that he was saying

“I can’t live without you and I have committed mistakes. From those mistakes I could understand that you mean a lot to me.”

They confessed their mistakes and both of them went back to France to live happily with each other. They both learnt that distance has made them rectify their mistakes and come to the conclusion that they love each other.

By Abdelaziz EL HAMMOUCHI